Fighting for the truth . . . exposing the corrupt

December 15, 2002

We begin our final edition of CAPERS for 2002 on a sad note. Tom Echelmeyer, long known for his “high five greeting” and calling people by their correct name and rank, collapsed on duty Dec. 6th and was rushed to Carlisle Hospital with severe internal bleeding and very high blood pressure.

At first, doctors hoped to stabilize his condition, but something went wrong. Tom died quietly the next day. He was well loved and fondly remembered by all those who appreciated his warmth and kindness. He was NOT one of the Carlisle Barracks RATS. He was a beloved member of the community, and we all mourn his passing.

The funeral was packed, and Chaplain “Sonny” Moore, as usual, did a beautiful job. You really notice it when a nice guy like Tom passes from our midst. God rest his soul.

ATTENTION: MIKE COLPO - (NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS) – We’ve always liked COL Colpo, even when he had to do some things working for THE HERO OF GRENADA as garrison commander that he might have found distasteful or just plain wrong. We hope he makes “flag rank” in the not-too-distant future and never forgets the coalfields where he came from.

We would like to think that our founder and inspiration, AWC graduate, the late Brig. Gen. Peter E. Genovese Jr., would have liked Mike if they had met. Gen. Genovese “fell on his sword” to maintain his integrity. He would have appreciated a man who “made general” without selling his soul and becoming a whore to get there. So you two would have been friends, colonel.

The old year is almost over and New Year’s resolutions are in order. May we be so bold as to suggest one for you, sir?

Make sure that NEVER AGAIN is a field-grade officer endangered and destroyed by lying scum with past criminal records. You know who we mean.

The folks over at Pratt Hall do a great job running the place, but as long as the walls stand, they will contain the memory and shame of the assassination of one honorable officer - a combat veteran who deserved better than being threatened by a bullying PMO (got that one on tape for the FBI); being “jumped from behind” in his workspace by two MP-CID “punks” who went for their guns in an intimidation attempt; one of them – nick-named MAD-DOG - later “hid” in a wall partition in the MP station, and when he heard the officer complain of “gross insubordination,” stepped out to take a swing at the surprised field-grade. The slimy PMO stepped between them to “pat” MAD-DOG’s arm and say soothingly: “That’s all right, that’s all right.” Translation: “Just wait, you can get a piece of HIM later.”

NEVER AGAIN should low-ranking enlisted personnel, especially a busted down private (bad check charge) and his bimbo wife (convicted child-abuser) be allowed to stay – as well as a proven liar and sting artist female JAG specialist – on the same floor, let alone the same quarters, with senior field-grade officers.

That was one of the many failures of the HERO OF GRENADA, who in reality was anything BUT a “hero” there. Most colonels would have seen their career head south after what he did – or we should say, didn’t do. Not this “glad-hander.” He was a politician’s politician. He made it all the way to three-stars on his so-called “charm.” But he’s far from “out of the woods” on a case of REAL discrimination and ill treatment of a civilian female worker on post. “What goes around will come around,” general. You should remember that.

What we are asking YOU, colonel, is to establish a “hard-and-fast rule” that non-NCO’s should NEVER be mixed in with superior officers in any quarters at Carlisle Barracks. The Army has good reasons to keep the ranks separate. THE HERO OF GRENADA’S negligence and indifference to his field-grade officers’ safety destroyed one life and outstanding military career.

Did you know that in the case of the assassinated officer, the accuser turned out to be a habitual “liar” (according to her female NCOIC in the USAR) and false accuser of other officers? Did you know that the “back up” complainers were not only “lowlifes” with a criminal background, but they met behind closed doors with THE KENTUCKY RUG MERCHANT in his office on Carlisle Barracks to get favors for their perfidy? Like a nice quick transfer to Aberdeen Proving Grounds to be close by in a custody battle over kids from a previous wife. There’s a word for that, colonel. It’s CONSPIRACY. And people go to Leavenworth when they’re convicted of it. But the Army brass chose to “look the other way.” Everybody is OUT now, retired or gone. The crime complete. But the SHAME lingers on.

To lighten the mood a bit, we remind our thousands of readers in the Carlisle area that the Barracks has always been an “interesting” place in more ways than one.

Thrusting skyward, like some giant phallic symbol, the post’s central water tower penetrates the skyline. If only that landmark could “talk,” what stories it could tell!

Like the time a light colonel known as “ARROGANT ED,” the “wannabe engineer man,” sent work crews up the tower and they ended up setting the structure on fire! The men were ordered to weld the upper tank while painters were still occupied on the same walkway. DUH!

They were within shouting distance of the firehouse, but too high to reach by ladder. Alert and creative firemen responded by hoisting multiple 10-pound fire extinguishers by rope to the terrified workers.

Our CI’s (that’s “confidential informants” to you NEW readers) tell us the “playboy” LTC liked to spend his days AND nights at the Barracks, “cheating on his wife” with the daughter of a retired Army warrant officer who just happened to work at DPW in a high-level management job.

We are told that almost a year later, a neglected faculty wife was sexually involved with a handsome young MP assigned to Carlisle Barracks.

Before long, the affair became public knowledge, and the husband had the military policeman shipped out in 48 hours. The disillusioned and love-struck young soldier mistakenly thought his “girlfriend” might leave the full-bull colonel she was married to and stand by HIM. No such luck! The wife just “used and dumped” the young MP. She knew where her bread was buttered.

Anyway, the heartbroken MP climbed the water tower on his last day of duty at the Barracks. In his hand was a gallon of black paint. In huge block letters he wrote: “FOR A GOOD TIME CALL . . .” and he gave the phone number of his recent paramour and the cuckold colonel, which we shall not.

The brass “flipped out” and ordered Contracting and Public Works to get the whole tower painted – FAST!
For those who may not remember, ARROGANT ED was head of the Department of Public Works - NOT “Pubic Works” - as some wags on post called it, before he retired to become “head janitor” (sanitary engineer) at a school down South.

For you Carlisle Barracks “history buffs” – and we don’t mean the campaigns of Caesar – the DPW “top job” was made a civilian position and Alan Thompson was hired away from the New Cumberland Depot to replace the “green-suiter” who preceded him. In the true spirit of a “comic opera,” Alan left his older wife and married a stunning young schoolteacher who is simply GORGEOUS. He has plenty of reason to proudly “show her off” at local theaters and eateries in Carlisle. We should be so lucky!

OLD-TIMERS on post, reminiscing about the so-called “good old days,” have asked us to write a special Christmas remembrance to former garrison commander, GRAVEDIGGER DAVE, also known as “the bogus body counter from VIETNAM.” He sure knew how to “pump up” the “kill reports” to please his bosses at the Pentagon, according to one CI.

Seems DAVE also found a clever way to hold down building costs on his new house out on Lisbon Road. Every night, before leaving post, our sources tell us, the colonel would stop in at Marie Hegglin’s Arts and Crafts Shop to “fill his uniform pockets with nails and spikes from the carpenter bins.” Then, we are told, he went to the building site and “worked for his builder,” (saving “beaucoup” bucks) in “framing out” the new home.

When old DAVE was on duty, he was continually frustrated that his military police force couldn’t keep children living on post from ripping the barn boards from Marie’s out buildings at Jacob’s Bed & Breakfast and vandalizing her wedding dress. Oh well, those were the “good old days,” right colonel?

It’s Christmas and we’re having FUN. No malice intended, DAVE. We hear you enjoy reading CAPERS from your family farm in Iowa. Happy New Year to you and yours.

Winter sure came quick to Carlisle Barracks. Too bad the OLD “changeover” dates to “fire up” the heating plant with an extended “warm-up time” prevailed. WHY is Alan Thompson continuing to deny necessary overtime for post workers to accomplish the biannual change over? Inquiring minds want to know.

Our frostbitten CI’s report that it got so cold in quarters on Marshall Road that the Catholic chaplain’s feet felt “numb.” It was 32 degrees Fahrenheit in his quarters at breakfast time. Can’t something be done about this?

A “tip of the hat” to veteran Government Inspector Frank Magni.

You see, Frank stood up to a greedy government contractor - or should we say “sub-contractor” - doing carpet installation in the Root Hall foyer. Seems the guy wanted MORE money to “finish” the job.

He and Frank took the disagreement to Armstrong Hall to have the matter arbitrated by Carlisle Barrack’s contracting officer. In this case, the wife of the aggrieved sub-contractor! ARE YOU FOLLOWING THE “INCEST” AND “CORRUPTION” HERE, BOYS AND GIRLS?

Well, we’re told that “MS. DILLSBURG” sided with her “hubby.” We are SHOCKED, just SHOCKED that such a thing could happen! Are you?

Those of you who work around Frank know he has a great set of lungs and his voice can be heard a long ways when he gets up to “full volume.” The dispute reportedly spilled out into the hallway.

A GS-13 government auditor assigned to work next door in Building 314 overheard the argument. Her eyes “got wide” and her trained ears picked up every word. This needs to be INVESTIGATED, she realized. Some “discreet inquiries” among subordinate workers in the Contracting Office – mostly oppressed and abused females – revealed a clever credit card “scam,” allegedly orchestrated by the “lady” from Dillsburg. “Naughty, naughty!”

We hear she tried to benefit her “hard-luck,” down-and-out husband. She may have even experienced “pangs of guilt” for once “tapping” him across the side of the head - OUCH! - with a “blunt instrument” during past domestic disputes, so well-reported in previous editions of the CAPERS.

This reputed “loser” failed to go the distance as an enlisted MP at Carlisle Barracks. He reportedly failed even bigger as a “private eye.” Next, she set him up with a van and tools to do “carpet installations.”

The two carpet jobs at Root Hall, the one at the Guesthouse, and another at the Golf House, were ALL procured, we are told, as credit card transactions. The alleged “straw man” vendor then reportedly sub-contracted the work to the former MP who hoped that no one on the Barracks would notice HIM doing the installations or have the COURAGE to go up against the high-flying HARPIE by making a formal complaint. Remember now, MS. DILLSBURG is a GM-13, the second-highest level civilian manager on post.

STAY TUNED FOLKS. There will be MORE “exciting” episodes ahead in this “too big to be believed” soap opera as it steadily unfolds. Can anyone recommend a successful and experienced criminal law firm?

CONGRATULATIONS to Adam Priester for making the GREAT ESCAPE from the “clutches” of DICKIE WIGGLEBOTTOM, the “light-in-the-loafers” tyrant who has been accused of cornering male staffers in the darkened passageways of Upton Hall manuscript stacks.

Adam still works at MHI, but he landed a promotion working in the vault with classified documents. We understand that many other MHI staffers coveted the job, as did desperate CIO workers about to be put out on the street.

Our CI’s tell us, as many as 21 new civil-service positions may be added in the months to come in hopes that the Institute will be ready to move on schedule. We’re told that Gen. Ivany has approved new jobs at the Institute only on condition that “RIF’d” CIO workers are given favorable consideration in all future hiring actions. Perhaps the STENCH of the questionable “J.S” promotion, orchestrated by her pals, THE BULLY (like a bad penny, he’s BAAAACK!) and henpecked SIMON LEGREE, still linger in the command’s nostrils.

NO WORD YET on the coveted Title X position at MHI, but we hear there’s such an “aroma” emanating from THE BULLY and his part-time buddy TOMMY-BOY, that neither of them are in the running anymore. That’s GOOD NEWS for the holiday season! You can almost hear the cheers going up from all – almost all – corners of Building 22!

While we’re on the subject of our beloved MHI, the worst and most incompetent director in many years, THE CHAMELEON, can only manage “part-time” work as a tour guide at the Eisenhower Farm, where his luckier wife has a better position. Apparently the two-faced Vietnam “war hero” (NOT) is unable to move up to the job he lusts for at Gettysburg. Even with “pull” from a female “pal,” he just can’t seem to make the grade.

One of THE CHAMELEON’s “cronies,” PEE WEE HERMAN, still shows up almost every day to eat breakfast at the Root Hall cafeteria with his only remaining friend at Carlisle Barracks. You might think PEE WEE’s former civilian and military staffers would be “glad” to see him back in the office as an overpaid consultant. WRONG, dear readers!

PEE WEE might have known how to save their jobs during an A-76 study, but at what price? Retired veterans of his “regime” tell us that this little rodent only promoted TWO subordinates during all his years of mis-management. Many who left his employ will attest that all they ever got from PEE WEE was excessive and ever-increasing workloads - and occasionally a new carpet to be chewed out on.

There’s lots more NEWS folks, but the column is running a bit long, so we’ll save some “goodies” for you next month. Until then, may all our MANY friends and supporters from every corner of Carlisle Barracks have a blessed and Merry Christmas, followed by a most Happy New Year. See you in 2003!

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