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CARLISLE BARRACKS CAPERS
October 15, 2003


WE KNOW WHO YOU ARE – On Monday, September 29, one of our many friends on Carlisle Barracks was walking through Anne Ely Hall around mid-day when they discovered an incredible thing.

An 8 by 10” page was tacked up on a bulletin board that attacked the editor-in-chief of MilitaryCorruption.com by name in a vulgar, slanderous and defamatory manner.

The word processor-printed “smear sheet” alluded to information – mostly inaccurate and untruthful – that had to have come from a clear and deliberate violation of The Privacy Act.

Meaning, this coward (who didn’t sign a name to the litany of abuse), had to have had a “co-conspirator” – someone we suspect is an Army officer.

That officer willfully and deceitfully violated Federal law, and – ARE YOU READING THIS, GEN. HUNTOON? – has now exposed the U.S. Army and Carlisle Barracks to a multi-million dollar damage lawsuit.

We are not going to dignify the vicious characterizations heaped upon our editor by an obviously “disturbed” person. But we ARE going to “have our day” in court!

You failed to successfully wipe your FINGERPRINTS off the red paper you used in your libelous assault. Apparently you didn’t count on one of our people very carefully removing the page and getting it to us in such a condition that our friends in law enforcement were able to detect and preserve your “prints,” both front and back of the page.

So you see, WE KNOW WHO YOU ARE.

While we aren’t going to tip our hand, we will tell our readers the main “perpetrator” of this outrage is a civilian, a U.S. Government employee. And the place this crime was committed, unluckily for Gen. Huntoon and the Pentagon, is a U.S. Army installation.

We have no doubt that a jury of citizens in Federal Court will not look kindly on what you did, or the Army’s complicity in it.

The very public battle we had and won with Carlisle Barracks over the illegal attempt to ban MCC and violate our First Amendment rights will – we are sure – be taken into account by jurors despite any “spin” the Army or bumbling former Pentagon “flacks” try to put on it.

There are specific rules for posting items on the bulletin boards of Carlisle Barracks, as we are sure the garrison commander knows. But they were not followed, and the LIABILITY here is clearly the Government’s.

While the perpetrator can also be prosecuted under Pennsylvania’s slander and libel laws – you could lose your job, pension, and most every dime you have, before we get done with you – we’re in the mood to offer you a once-in-a-lifetime “deal.”

Our attorneys will seriously consider an agreement whereby you will NOT be charged with any crime or sued for damages IF you provide us with a signed, notarized affidavit IDENTIFYING the Army officer who leaked to you information upon which you based your slanderous attack on our editor.

Under the law, all this officer had to do was verbally disclose information to a person not authorized to receive it, let alone show or provide a copy of any such document to an unauthorized party, in order to be found GUILTY of violation of the Privacy Act of 1974.

We very much would like to see that person punished, as we are sure you can well understand. If you have any brains at all, you will cut your losses and do the right thing. Give up your source, NOW! You can reach us at staff@militarycorruption.com. We need to hear from you by November 1, 2003. If we do not, YOU will “take the fall.” There will be NO deals or plea bargains offered after that date.

(PS) – You mislabeled some of the envelopes you mailed from Harrisburg in your other more recent endeavor. We got them – unopened – with your FINGERPRINTS inside. Frankly, you aren’t too bright.


MORE ON BIG MAMMA – Just to show we won’t be intimidated or silenced, we continue, as promised, the “saga” of BIG MAMMA.

Seems she needs even more money these days, since the ENERGIZER BUNNY doesn’t hand over his paycheck anymore.

While she holds down a well-paying job on post, we are told she waits on tables (are you reporting all your “tip” income to the IRS, BIG MAMMA?) She also works at the speedway selling tickets.

Our CI’s tell us that while she’s working all these jobs, she has a former Barracks employee – who was allegedly fired for stealing – working as her “live-in” NANNY to take care of her house and kids. Word is the NANNY is getting “burned out” and doesn’t do as much as he used to. This makes BIG MAMMA very mad!

Friends on the Barracks tell us BIG MAMMA’s worried about losing her job when RCI comes through next year. She’s allegedly looking to “bump” anyone out that she can, just so she can “hang on” to her government job.

BIG MAMMA’s second husband is now employed by Griffin Services – thanks to his well-connected ex-wife. He’s been seen sneaking in and out of her back door. Word is, she should have stayed with him, but alas, now he’s married.

The latest news is BIG MAMMA is “hot on the trail” of a past lottery winner whom she thinks still has money. But it’s all gone now. Tough luck, BIG MAMMA. You won’t be able to get any BUCK$ out of him.


BUMBLING BUCHER – This “fast-track” former Pentagon flack is complaining loud and long to all who will listen about our latest story on her ineptitude which caught the attention of thousands of readers, including some of her former “colleagues” at the Pentagon and PERSCOM.

So much so, that these folks have kindly contacted us with their not-so-fond “recollections” of this hard-charging PAO. We found this information to be most interesting and illuminating and wish to publicly THANK our newest friends for their input.

That goes for the individuals, including one former West Point classmate, who contacted us about our article on “NO COMBAT COLPO.” MIKEY made a lot of powerful friends during all those years he “rode a desk,” but also made his share of enemies. And they delight in our chronicling his excesses on the pages of MilitaryCorruption.com.


PATRONAGE PROGRAM AT AHEC – Our confidential informants report that “MAJOR WALMART” runs a virtual “Tammany Hall” patronage program at the new Army Heritage and Education Center (AHEC).

This assistant “price-cutter” is said to be using his sword and cape to cut some clever corners and disqualify distinguished veteran civil service workers from promotions. Many of them have worked hard to earn advancement in the dust-choked halls of Building 22.

Mike Whiney was clearly the best qualified for Museum Curator GS-12. But Mike was “bullied” to withdraw his application by threats of alleged salary cuts to offset his earlier retirement check. The loss would be considerable. So instead, the job went to GIGGLIN’ JACK, the Pennsylvania patronage worker with little future left in State government.

His critics say he is “part snake-oil salesman, Pied Piper of Hamlin, and the Rainmaker” all rolled up into one. We say he is certainly a lucky and well-connected guy.

Many veteran professionals predict disaster before the transition is complete to the new building. We’ll soon see if GIGGLIN’ JACK is up for the job.


A NICE GUY – We’re glad to see AHEC is promoting “STAN THE GUARD.” He’s one of the nicer people in Upton Hall. It’s good to see a fellow “editor” (Stan did a good job with the in-house newsletter) get a well-deserved break.

MCC has always believed the “written word” is ultimately more powerful than any “firearm. Stan will be “hanging up his holster” to join the professional staff on the second floor. Congratulations.

We support Stan’s view that guards at the museum complex don’t need to carry loaded weapons. Long ago, an accidental weapons discharge in the Provost Marshall’s Office cost Stan the price of a government clock, which we understand, still runs and keeps the correct time.

A careless sergeant bears most of the blame for the “stray bullet,” but alas, Stan got a suspension and had to pay for the clock. Later, the PMO regretted the unjust punishment and doled out enough “overtime” pay to offset his harsh and hasty decision.

It’s been a long time since we’ve had officers with such a conscience sitting in the PMO’s chair.


FUMIGATING THE FINANCE AND ACCOUNTING BUILDING -- The last weekend in August was selected to quietly let “MS. DILLSBURG” slip back on post to “clean out” any personal property from her office. We hear the PMO personally inspected what she took with her.

This former Director of Contracting used to “enjoy” humiliating her staff, whom she frequently tried to FIRE. One of the first of her many “victims” was told to clean out his desk at noon in full view of subordinates and fellow workers.

When a local manager from Carter Lumber showed up asking how to collect $100,000 from a government contractor, MS.DILLSBURG and her assembled HARPIES were stumped! The Civilian Personnel Office was asked to suspend the removal process long enough for the GS-11 victim to “bail the BOSS out.” She still proceeded to fire him, until attorney Peter Broida and a MSPB judge exposed her “frame-up.”

WHAT GOES AROUND, FINALLY DOES COME AROUND.


AN OLDTIMER’S ADVICE – Some wide-eyes innocents gathered around one of Carlisle Barracks most respected and revered civil servants to clamor for building latchkeys and more responsibility. The admonition they got was to seek neither and instead watch their backs at all times. In the Army nothing ever happens by “accident.” Someone is always held accountable - no matter how far-fetched the circumstances!

Like the time Alan Thompson and his crew got it in their heads to tear down an old wooden storage building that used to be located behind Root Hall. They cleared the foundation in a single day and hauled the debris to the Golf House dump. That night, the MP’s did their usual “door shake inspection” at 1800 hours.

The next day, the MP’s went to the GS-11 in Root Hall, who had signed for the key to the padlock on the missing building. He was promptly arrested and charges with the theft of a government building! Something was gone, and so SOMEONE had to be made responsible for the loss!

In another confrontation with the MP’s, a government worker had to go to magistrate’s court and bail out his wife, sister and daughter. They had been taken into MP custody for allegedly driving 16 miles per hour in a 15 MPH zone. The MP who made the “pinch” went on to a successful civilian career at the Barracks. Does anyone know that DRM’s Les Rockey began his climb to top “bean counter” as a Carlisle Barracks MP?


LEAVING A MESS BEHIND – Candidates are not exactly rushing the gate to fill the GS-09 billet left vacant in the AHEC Collection Management Division after HOTPANTS hit the road to West Pennsboro’s School District. Two senior female staffers have found such a mess they say it might take 30 years to clean up in the manuscript archives.

MAJOR WALMART played a big role in elevating HOTPANTS from a GS-04 clerical employee to GS-09 in only 11 months. ELMER FUDD and THE BULLY get the rest of the credit. One female subordinate reportedly said: “Boy, would I ever like to show that drunk what a mess HOTPANTS made!”


OUR HEARTS GO OUT TO YOU – To Mrs. Evelyn Boyer, the loveable and friendly medical secretary in nurse Bill Berger’s office at Dunham Clinic. Her long-awaited family vacation was put aside this year as her family learned that a serious medical condition has occurred for Mr. Boyer.

All of us need to pray for God’s intervention to guide the surgeon’s hand. This fine lady always has a smile on her face and a warm greeting for everyone she meets and works with. We all miss her while she joins her family in this time of crisis.

A lady like Evelyn reminds us that the vast majority of the Carlisle Barracks workers are good and decent people. To them, we dedicate each issue of CARLISLE BARRACKS CAPERS.


AFGE SHAKE-UP – The union’s convention voted to raise dues by $1.25 per pay period in promise that the money will be used to defeat President George W. Bush in the 2004 election.

The delegates also voted to oust the man they dubbed “sleepy, do-nothing” International President Bobby Harnage and replace him with the obscure President of a Baltimore local.

The “winds of change” are starting to blow in central Pennsylvania where under-achieving local officers have dominated the AFGE locals for years. “Look out,” LAME-BRAIN LAURE, SANTA CLAUS SAM (aka THE DILLSBURG DUMMY); ROCKY THE FLYING SQUIRREL; and SKIPPY LARSEN, the infamous chief steward and “box kicker” from New Cumberland.


SECRET STUFF – What former PMO, a nasty drunk and “bully boy” who always was “hitting on” a certain waitress at the Club in years gone by, is about to get a very unpleasant surprise?

Seems his wife is about to learn about all his extra-curricular activities. Could be heading for divorce court.


TO OUR READERS: The Harrisburg PATRIOT-NEWS has proven itself to be not only the dominant newspaper in Central Pennsylvania, but a “MUST READ” in Carlisle. That is, if you want to know ALL the news emanating from Carlisle Barracks, not just the “official” version sdoled out by the Public Affairs Office. So, if you haven’t already, “switch over” to the PATRIOT-NEWS. You won’t be sorry.


UNTIL NEXT TIME – THANK YOU FOR ALL THE WONDERFUL SUPPORT YOU GAVE US THAT LED UP TO OUR RECENT VICTORY OVER “BUMBLING BUCHER,” “NO-COMBAT COLPO” AND CRIMINAL CENSORSHIP AT CARLISLE BARRACKS – GOD BLESS YOU ALL! ALSO A WARM WELCOME TO THE THOUSANDS OF NEW READERS OF “CARLISLE BARRACKS CAPERS” THAT JOIN US THIS MONTH ON THE INTERNET.

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